Skip to main content

Not Before...Just the Present

You know, despite having lost 150lbs previously (kept most of it off for 10+ years, but my last baby and Covid combined to my having about 70lbs more than I want to have back on), and having our before pics shown every where on national media, international magazine covers and media, all over the internet etc...this feels different. It feels different because I have NEVER EVER shared a before picture until I had an AFTER picture. Or a before weight. And once you have the AFTER picture, the before picture doesn't seem so bad, right? Because it's not current. It's not present, it's not reality. It's a BEFORE. Not a NOW. Not an AFTER. But I'm at a different place now, where I want my whole journey this time to just be present and authentic even in the uncomfortable places. So here's my CURRENT pic. And my CURRENT weight. Nothing else, just that. Just me, in this moment, being present and loving myself in this body, even if it's not the healthiest, best version of myself. And there's a freedom and healing in that, honestly. My body gained weight weirdly because of my skin removal surgery and abdominal sewing. No more FUPA every again, WOOHOO but it also makes it really tight and uncomfortable in my belly. Kinda like a balloon expanding in there, I dunno. But here I am, as I am. 262.7. I feel best and healthiest in my body at 190lbs so that's my goal-never will be skinny cuz I'm a thicc girl haha but 190 feels healthy and great for me. And honestly in these pics, the thing I'm most embarrassed about is actually my 2000 souvenir tramp stamp tattoo HAHAHAHA.
Labels:

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Chicken Wing Dip

Seems like there's many varieties and ways to make this-this is what I do, and Keith loves it-I think it's pretty good too, but I can only eat so much of it, it's kinda greasy and I don't know...good but I like it in a buffet eating it with a LOT of other stuff, not as a main course or anything. Keith disagrees :) Thanks to BETH for introducing us to this magical dip LOL Chicken Wing Dip 2 (8 ounce) packages cream cheese, softened 3/4 cup wing sauce of your choice (we use Frank's) 1 cup bleu cheese 2 cups diced cooked chicken 1 cup shredded Cheddar cheese preheat the oven to 350 In a medium bowl, stir together the cream cheese and sauce until well blended. Mix in the bleu cheese, chicken and Cheddar cheese. Spread into a 9x13 inch baking dish Bake for 30 minutes in the preheated oven. If oil collects on the top, dab it off using a paper towel. Serve with tortilla chips.
5 comments
Nom Nom Nom

Product Review

Keith and I made a pact awhile ago to try new things. Every week we attempt to try one new thing we have previously never had, or been scared to try or whatever. And it's been awesome, we've been enjoying so many things that we've been missing out on, and Mairi of course loves anything LOL so she benefits from it as well. A few weeks ago while grocery shopping, I spotted this jar of Tikka Masala. I was like, hmm, that looks good and healthy and nice to have for the times I don't want to cook or whatever. I grabbed it, bought and promptly threw it in the back of my cupboard. Keith busted it out tonight, and made a FABULOUS chicken and quinoa dish (we are obsessed with quinoa, did you know it's like BREASTMILK? and you all know how i feel about that :P It's a complete protein with an essential amino acid balance close to breastmilk!) and wow. Now I want to make it, and so shortly I'll be trying out a recipe for it, but in the meantime, if you come across this...
2 comments
Nom Nom Nom

Buffalo Chicken Chili Mac

This was a staple when pregnant with Eli. It's a Rachel Ray recipe that Krysten intro'd me too, THANK YOU. So, so much. Buffalo Chicken Chili Mac 2 tablespoons extra-virgin olive oil (EVOO) 2 pounds (about 4 to 6, depending on size) boneless, skinless chicken breasts, cut into small bits *note, I use precooked Wegman's frozen grilled chicken breasts, so that cuts down on work LOL* 1 large onion, chopped (I use like 4 onions b/c we love them so very, very much) 5 large cloves garlic, finely chopped or grated 1 tablespoon smoked paprika(i used regular if I don't have smoked, I also sometimes use 1T all seasons salt, that's my FAVE way!) 1 bay leaf Salt and freshly ground black pepper 2 cups chicken stock 1/4 to 1/2 cup hot sauce/buffalo wing sauce, depending on how hot you like it 1 15-ounce can crushed tomatoes 1 pound whole wheat elbow macaroni(i use any fusilli) 1/2 cup pepper jack cheese 1/2 cup blue cheese Preheat broiler and place a large pot of salted water ov...
4 comments
Nom Nom Nom